The Long Complicated Answer
So it's time for another post and my big sister gave me the means for this one, when she asked me a question on Facebook today...
She asked:
"So how's this transition back into academic life treating you?"
And my answer is:
The school part is mostly okay - my classes are great but there is, obviously, a lot of reading and work involved and finding the time to do it is difficult... I'm really liking being back at school. It's nice to be able to sit and listen to an adult speak about something that I'm interested in, and having conversations with other 'big people' is wonderful too (instead of just kids all the time).
At the same time, the whole process is just that bit more difficult because I can't do my reading or work when I'm alone with the kids, and that is most of the week. Fortunatley mom has been taking Za&S to the farm overnight on Mondays and Wednesdays - so I usually end up at the University until at least 1am those nights doing work and reading - and Chessenda or Brenda deals with Zo and getting her to school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Sundays Obie is usually happy to keep the kids to himself for a while, so I can sometimes disappear to school (or lock myself in my bedroom) for a couple hours. Then I usually go back to school after I've got the kids in bed on Sunday night for another couple hours of work.
School is always hard, it's supposed to be, doing it with the kids is more of a juggle then I like. I don't want to say that I'm not going to keep doing some classes and wait until S is ready for pre-k before I go back to do any more... but it might come to that. Or, I'm in three classes right now, maybe I'll just do one from now on. I feel bad for complaining because I am only at the school 2 days a week but I think 2 days, with three kids (and their school, dance, skating and just their "being" kids) is sometimes too much, and I can't imagine how people do full time - school or work - when they've got a couple kids. Maybe I'm just spoiled because I've had the opportunity to stay home for the last couple of years......
It's not that I couldn't do it, because I am and other people do it all the time, but I want to be around for my own kids - I want to dress up and go to Halloween parties with my kids at school, I want to be able to spend time with them and get them ready for school pictures, I want to be able to take care of them all the time when they are sick, or hurt, and I want to be with them when they do really cool things for the first time, or start talking, or potty train... I feel like I'm missing so much and I don't like it, and it's not fair to them.
So that's a really long answer to your question. In short: the transitions been hard. I like what I am doing while I am at school but I don't like what I'm missing by being there. Make sense?
At the same time, the whole process is just that bit more difficult because I can't do my reading or work when I'm alone with the kids, and that is most of the week. Fortunatley mom has been taking Za&S to the farm overnight on Mondays and Wednesdays - so I usually end up at the University until at least 1am those nights doing work and reading - and Chessenda or Brenda deals with Zo and getting her to school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Sundays Obie is usually happy to keep the kids to himself for a while, so I can sometimes disappear to school (or lock myself in my bedroom) for a couple hours. Then I usually go back to school after I've got the kids in bed on Sunday night for another couple hours of work.
School is always hard, it's supposed to be, doing it with the kids is more of a juggle then I like. I don't want to say that I'm not going to keep doing some classes and wait until S is ready for pre-k before I go back to do any more... but it might come to that. Or, I'm in three classes right now, maybe I'll just do one from now on. I feel bad for complaining because I am only at the school 2 days a week but I think 2 days, with three kids (and their school, dance, skating and just their "being" kids) is sometimes too much, and I can't imagine how people do full time - school or work - when they've got a couple kids. Maybe I'm just spoiled because I've had the opportunity to stay home for the last couple of years......
It's not that I couldn't do it, because I am and other people do it all the time, but I want to be around for my own kids - I want to dress up and go to Halloween parties with my kids at school, I want to be able to spend time with them and get them ready for school pictures, I want to be able to take care of them all the time when they are sick, or hurt, and I want to be with them when they do really cool things for the first time, or start talking, or potty train... I feel like I'm missing so much and I don't like it, and it's not fair to them.
So that's a really long answer to your question. In short: the transitions been hard. I like what I am doing while I am at school but I don't like what I'm missing by being there. Make sense?
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Now, it's Halloween this Saturday so I should be able to put up a couple of pictures of the kids after the weekend... (For those of you who can, I put up a few pics of the kids skating - from my phone - on Facebook earlier this week.) Till next time!!! Happy Halloween and be safe when you trick or treat!!
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