A Corner Table in My World

This time of year, as many of you will know from following me over the years, is never a good time for me. I am very often inundated by recurring waves of depression and have come to refer to these early months of the year as my ‘dark times.’ I can’t predict when it’s going to hit, nor can I predict the severity of the occurrence. All I can do from year to year is try my best to keep my head and heart straight, and when it hits, do my best to keep my head above water. This year… I just don’t know what’s going to happen this year. My Grandma and I 2 weeks before her death... After watching my grandmother fight and rally and fight for her life some more, and lose little by little every day and week over the last months, it was quite honestly a relief and a blessing when she passed away a couple weeks ago. We knew that her end was coming and what’s more, she knew it too and was ready for it. She was ready to go and we could only let her. We’re all happy tha...

I’ve often talked about the turns that life takes – a misdirection, a surprise chance, a leap of faith, a crisis of the heart. Life is simply complicated and there really is no other true explanation for the chaos that life sometimes seems to be but that. Sometimes the twists are wonderful and sometimes they are heartbreaking. Either way they simply are and it is through them that we discover strengths within ourselves, and hidden depths within us that we never knew existed. My family has always been the type to pull together in times of trouble or need. I remember when I was sixteen, learning that one of my oldest and best friends had died, and thinking that all I really wanted was my mom and dad. And they were there for me. When I was seventeen and my dad knocked on my door before dawn to tell me that my maternal grandmother had just died, that he was going to meet my mom and her siblings at the hospital and that I needed to stay with my younger sister. I ...