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Dark Times, Death, and Parenting

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This time of year, as many of you will know from following me over the years, is never a good time for me. I am very often inundated by recurring waves of depression and have come to refer to these early months of the year as my ‘dark times.’ I can’t predict when it’s going to hit, nor can I predict the severity of the occurrence. All I can do from year to year is try my best to keep my head and heart straight, and when it hits, do my best to keep my head above water. This year… I just don’t know what’s going to happen this year. My Grandma and I 2 weeks before her death... After watching my grandmother fight and rally and fight for her life some more, and lose little by little every day and week over the last months, it was quite honestly a relief and a blessing when she passed away a couple weeks ago. We knew that her end was coming and what’s more, she knew it too and was ready for it. She was ready to go and we could only let her. We’re all happy tha...
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The Kids Growing Up Does Not Mean I'm Getting Old

Three weeks ago the kids went back to school and this year saw a big change for us. I picked their school very deliberately years ago. You see, Heli Dad and I both grew up in small towns - I attended the same school from kindergarten through high school graduation, he was at the same school until grade ten. We wanted that kind of learning community for our own kids and we are extremely lucky that we found that in a school very close to our home. We've been fortunate that our kids are able to attend their school right from preschool through grade nine.  This September, Princess started grade 10.  New school, new people... It's been a big adjustment for us all.  And boy, high school.   I don't think it's really even necessary for me to say more than that, is it? I have so many really great memories of high school, but I've got my share of bad ones too. And while so many things have changed in our society and in our culture, so many of the quintessential hig...
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A Strange World Emerging

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Uncertain times. Strange days. Weird, weird happenings. Here in Alberta we are still in the early days of this global pandemic. The numbers of infected in our province are still relatively low, comparatively, and in my personal area we’ve had only a few confirmed cases. We’re all preparing for worse days – some more ridiculously than others, but I know none of us can truly comprehend what’s coming. Reading articles, letters, and blogs from people who are already further along the pandemic timeline (places like China, Italy, Spain, etc) give us an idea of what to expect. But it’s not the same. And none of us will truly understand what those people have gone through until we too are going through it. Which is scary. Nay, it’s (slightly) terrifying. It’s scary and terrifying because it’s so incomprehensible. It’s so completely unknown. And then add in the various ways so many of our lives have been turned upside down, and that just magnifies the fear. The unce...
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